


Apart from the World

by prince_pelleas



Category: Fate/EXTRA, Fate/Grand Order, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: Gen, Introspection, Mild Spoilers for Kiara's backstory, The Little Mermaid is strongly featured because of how it connects to Kiara
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:47:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25683019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prince_pelleas/pseuds/prince_pelleas
Summary: As a child, Kiara reads "The Little Mermaid" to feel better due to her illness waking her up, and reflects on the novel and it's meaning to her, despite not fully being able to understand what the message of the story is, or what it means as a whole.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Apart from the World

**Author's Note:**

> I find it really interesting how despite Kiara being the one with the Little Mermaid motif, and even summoning Hans due to her connection with his books, Kiara is fundamentally wrong about the idea of the Little Mermaid, because she cannot understand selfless love, and how the mermaid is redeemed through her love, to the point of being able to ascend and gain a soul. (On the other hand, the Little Mermaid strongly parallels BB's arc).
> 
> As such, I wanted to write about a younger Kiara reading the story and how it would seem to her back then!

The young girl woke up, startled by her own coughing. 

"Ah... Again?"

Sniffling slightly, she sat up, trying to ignore the aches plaguing her body. Letting out a couple more coughs, she leaned back against her pillow, trying her best to not jostle her limbs, as to not cause any more pain. 

Once again, no one was there by her bedside. But despite this, the glow from the outside still shone within her canopy - her own little shelter from a world she didn't belong to. She could hear soft voices outside, but paid them no mind - they would not come visit her, and she would not call out for them. When she was younger, she had tried to, but it had been futile, and she had learned better. The adults out there, who would hate, laugh and enjoy themselves existed as though in another world - like shadow puppets, futile to hope for love from. 

Her hand reached out to grasp the book of fairy tales lying beside her. It's cover was worn, and it's ribbon tattered, but she still traced the faded outline of the mermaid on the cover with her index finger out of habit. No matter how sick she got, or how her body gave up on her, the book was always by her side, ever since she was a child. 

Opening it, she mouthed the words she knew by heart - 

_Far out at sea the water is as blue as the petals of the loveliest cornflower and as clear as the purest glass, but it is very deep, deeper than any anchor cable can reach, many church towers would have to be placed on top of each other to stretch from the sea-bed to the surface._

Oh, how she wished to be in that world - while she had never seen cornflowers, or the sea, or church towers, they beckoned to her. Whenever she read the story, it was as though all her pains and aches and illness disappeared - for once, she could be at peace, and pretend that she could leave her bed, and see the outside world.

The din outside grew slightly louder - there was probably a celebration or festival going on somewhere in the school. While she had never seen them, sometimes, when her curtains were opened to give her food, or medicine, she would catch small glimpses of people wearing strange clothes, walking back and forth, smiling, laughing. That's probably what they were doing right now. And she would not be able to join them. 

She let out a sigh. No matter how much she tried to accept her situation, it still hurt. According to her stories, family was supposed to be warm, but no one was ever like that towards her. Were the stories just a lie? Blinking back tears, she continued to read her fairy tale- maybe one day, she would be able to leave, and see the world, and meet other people. And for now, the fairy tales would bring her joy - they always did. 

She continued to read, hoping that the book would calm her and let her drift off eventually, despite the pain. The Little Mermaid was her favorite, after all, and if anything could cure pain, it could. 

As she reached the end, she chose to read the final lines out loud, if only to hear the words once again. It reminded her of the past, and when she used to have nurses that would read to her, and she was rarely alone. 

_And the little mermaid lifted her clear arms towards God’s sun, and for the first time she felt tears._

The ending always made her sad - why would the mermaid not choose to stay with her family? Why would she leave those that loved her? If she was in the mermaid's place, she wouldn't lift her arms towards God - she would become a God herself - she would be the one that granted salvation, not the one that had to suffer, work, live for it. While she would never tell that to anyone at the temple, as the daughter of the head maybe she could do it - if she ever recovered, and got a chance to inherit, that is. 

At that, she let out a wistful sigh - how wonderful it would be, to be able to recover. To go outside, and play games, and attend parties, and be able to lead those - but it was not to be. 

No. If she couldn't become a god, she would not allow herself to be betrayed in the first place - she would not allow the prince to deny her love, and to leave her to suffer. 

With those thoughts, Kiara drifted off to sleep, unaware of her fate, and unable to understand. 

She would probably never come to know the power of love to redeem, or the warmth of true, selfless love.


End file.
